SPEAKING OF
FLAUNTING IT

There are exhibitionists, of course, those jolly perverts who get off on exposing themselves in whole or private part, and often in places they shouldn't. But "showing off" is a lot more varied than flashing at the supermarket.

No matter who you are, no matter what you look like, someone somewhere is going to be turned on by the way you look, so why not let a bit of assertive self-presentation help things along?

Gym rats and the naturally gorgeous may be most likely to flaunt their fabulousness, but even the less perfect among us might find it fun to shed our self-consciousness. "I used to be so uptight that I wouldn't wear shorts out on the street," says a formerly shy guy. "But then I kind of forced myself to wear shorts a lot, and that gave me the confidence to wear more revealing things, till now I can happily strut around naked on a nude beach."

Showing off can be as simple as stripping to the waist on a hot day, or as elaborate as donning backless chaps and a studded codpiece to cruise a sex club. It's not just a matter of trying to get attention; it's about showcasing your best assets. "Not to boast," says Formerly Shy, "but I'm pretty well-hung, and I just love to wear really tight cycle shorts. Having my basket front and centre encased in lycra makes me feel really sexy, and I love itwhen I catch guys checking it out."

So put your best foot - or crotch - forward, even if you're not stereotypically stunning. "Best assets" is a matter of subjective judgment, after all, and booty is in the eye of the beholder. Not everybody is into the perfect-six-pack look of Calvin Klein underwear models; that guy in the open-back chaps may have a big, hairy arse, but there are plenty of men into big, hairy arses.

And attitude counts. "One of the things that makes a guy sexy," opines a man-fan, "is his self-presentation. Somebody who's classically gorgeous but seems withdrawn and distant is a lot less hot to me than a more ordinary man who radiates sexual confidence. If a man knows how to sell what he's got, he's at least halfway there."

This may require a bit of self-assessment: figuring out what your own strong points are and how to highlight them. Tight T-shirts are not only great for guys with to-die-for pecs, but for proudly beer-bellied bears, and for skinny boys selling slenderness, too.

Following fashion? If young guys are dressing in baggy, low-slung pants and you've got long, shapely legs, maybe you should swim against the tide of trendiness and don tight jeans. It's long been a cliche that beach-going gays will wear clingy Speedos even when they're distinctly out of fashion, so why hide a bulging basket or a fuckable butt under acres of baggy surfer jams?

Why not, in fact, be shameless as possible within the bounds of semi-good taste, subtlety be damned? "I recall," says that horny observer, "being out on the street, cruising this guy in tight-fitting jeans who had his thumbs tucked in his pockets, his extended hands forming a 'hey-look-at-this' frame around his big basket. I couldn't take my eyes off him, but then, only a blind man could help but notice his featured attraction. Within seconds I was hard, and within an hour, we were in bed."

And that's show-off biz.

Simon Sheppard

San Francisco artist and activist Simon Sheppard is best known for his contributions to the erotic literary scene. He wrote hundreds of stories that appeared in S/M magazines; erotic anthologies; and over twenty editions of Best Gay Erotica and Best American Erotica. His Sextalk column has appeared on OutUK for more than 20 years. You can find out more about Simon Sheppard in this OutUK feature and tribute, or take a look at some of his many books that are still available:

       

Looking for something very sexy and just as smart? Man on Man collects the best and hottest gay sex writing by Simon, who is also co-editor of Rough Stuff: Tales of Gay Men, Sex, and Power as well as a collection of gay erotica called Hotter Than Hell.

In KINKORAMA : Dispatches from the Front Lines of Perversion he takes readers behind the unmarked doors and black vinyl curtains that lead to the sometimes shocking, often hilarious, relentlessly arousing scenarios of extreme sex. There are also stories of bears in Tales from the Bear Cult: Beat Bear Stories from the Best Magazines.