Then stroll a few yards around the bend to the Jolly Farmers on the sublimely named Paradise Street. This is ye olde community hub of a pub in town, where queer locals of all genders and ages will merrily prattle away the hours, mulling over life and love or reliving the recent Pride blow-by-blow. Also does good food throughout the day up until early evening.

Probably time to up the ante pre-club now: so make your faint excuses and flit outrageously to the arch competitor that is The Castle, a few doors down on the corner. You’ll have already heard all the gripes about how this establishment has “gone all London” and packs ‘em in, mainly men, for the sake of the Pink Pound. But this place certainly sorts the men from the boys, all spilling out to pose in the streets along its long outdoor ramps all summer, with the Rainbow Room downstairs open ‘til 2am after hours.

If it’s Friday and you want a credible club, then head for the spookily named Coven, back beyond the pubs, along Oxpens Rd - right next to the ice rink. Also called the Love Shack for obvious reasons, and looking rather like a deserted garage in a cross between Blair Witch and Psycho, it opens out almost miraculously into a sizable space with a long bar and alcoves leading to two dance floors, a smaller one above mainly for R&B, and a larger sunken one below for more hardcore trance - though nothing to frighten the horses.

When Coven shuts its doors at 2am, unofficial cruising ground is the parkland the other side of the ice rink and, incidentally, the site of the first ever Oxford Pride earlier this year. Another quick aside: the nearest gay sauna is in Banbury.

But if you fancy something a little less cred than Coven, check out Oxford's LGB Centre, Northgate Hall - on St. Michael’s Street, just five minutes’ walk back in towards town. This has variously been described as a cross between a church hall and a school canteen, but no less charming for that. It functions like a club at nights, playing pure cheese, but has more of an atmosphere where you can actually chat to your friends or get to know new people if that’s your want. The venue is members-only, but you can often find a friendly, loose member hanging out near the door happy to sign you in as guest if you can’t stump up the small fee. It’s boys and girls on a Thursday and is quite literally the only place to be on a Saturday.

It’s also worth mentioning the Old Fire Station (OFS) on George Street just around the corner from Northgate. A café-bar by day, OFS hosts the Flirt gay night on Mondays, which is highly popular - especially with that elusive and much sought-after dirty stop-out student crowd.

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Oxford is about an hour away from London Paddington by Thames Trains. For information and booking www.thamestrains.co.uk.